The Vivekean Times

You better watch out For you will only cry Better not smile, I'm telling you why, Modi Claus is coming to town! He's making a fake encounter list and checking it twice, While CBI books online citizens who were naughty not nice Modi Claus will perform Ghar Vapsi in town! Sahib spies on girls when they're sleeping, He knows when they're awake, He knows when Minorities are good or bad, Remember Gujarat 2002 for Goodness Sake! You better watch out For you will only cry Better not smile, I'm telling you why, Modi Claus is coming to town! (We will conclude with the famous Christmas poem "T'was the night before Good Governance Day")

Smriti the egg-faced Mantri had a very long, long nose, and every time she lies, One inch longer it grows. All of the other Mantris, used to laugh and call her names, they never let poor Smriti, play in any right wing games! Then one smoggy Good Governance Eve, Modi came to say, "Smriti with your nose so long, why don't you sing a Sanghi song" Then how the mantris loved her, as she flashed her fake Yale Degree, Smriti, the egg-faced Mantri, is distorting texts of Indian History! (Note: Our next carol is "Modi Claus is Coming to Town....on an Adani Jet")

Welcome to our Christmathon! This year we celebrate this joyous occasion with the proper fine-tuning of our content that is desperately needed, given the changed political climate in our country. So, we have modified some of the popular Christmas Carols and poems for the benefit of our more "patriotic" readers.  All school and college students are supposed to learn these poems and songs online on Good Governance Day i.e. 25th December, which by a strange coincidence happens to be a major festival of non-Indian origin that has been imported from the West i.e. Israel. Here's a sample verse: I'm dreaming of a Swachh Bharat, Just like the one we never knew; Where history books burn, and children heads turn to hear the sound of riots from which they eschew! I'm dreaming of a Swachh Bharat, With every Good Governance essays we write; May your diet be veggie and teetotaled, and may all your Good Governance days be DRY!! Dear Readers, he...